The Terror
They are terrifying things. Powerful things with arms that swing and, yes, destroy if you should venture too close. And the noise, the noise; dull, incessant, so frightening. We are wary of them. We try to keep them at a distance. Perhaps if we gather together for safety, perhaps if we amass out at sea then it will go away. Yes! Yes! It runs! Look how it heads back to its parents! We are safe. For now, we are safe. But we must be ever vigilant. Google+: View post on...
50 Doctor Who Facts For Doctor Who’s Fiftieth Anniversary
Well, it’s sneaking up quietly on us – you’d think that the BBC might be promoting it a little bit more yet so far: nothing – but this weekend marks the fiftieth anniversary of the world’s favourite science fiction television show about a regenerating time traveller and his penchant for getting into scrapes with alien adversaries mostly in modern day Cardiff, Wales and Victorian England, England (narrowly beating out Rai Uno’s Signor Mussolini e la Macchina del Tempo Bikini); I’m talking, of course, about the BBC sci-fi TV series Doctor Who. So, to commemorate the occasion of the anniversary of Doctor Who’s first showing on BBC TV in 1963 I’ve compiled a list of fifty facts about the Time Lord, safe in the knowledge that nobody else will have thought to do the same. 1. Many early episodes of Doctor Who have been lost as the tape on which they were recorded was reused as costumes for Blake’s 7. 2. When asked who is the sexiest companion most Doctor Who fans look uncomfortable and mumble something incoherently. But it’s probably Adric. 3. In the episode Earthshock, Doctor Who’s companian Tegan describes herself as “just a mouth on legs”, an inside joke referring to the initial design for her character. 4. On set the TARDIS is known as “The Shaggin’ Cabin” and it can comfortably accommodate three. 5. At the Phoenix 2010 Doctor Who convention organisers accidentally booked Neil Tennant to appear instead of David. Everyone, including the fans, was too polite to say anything so the main speaking event consisted of ninety minutes of uncomfortable silence followed by an a capella rendition of West End Girls. 6. K-1 was infested with robo-fleas and was left by the roadside by Patrick Troughton’s Doctor Who in The Macra Terror. 7. You can tell which episodes of Doctor Who were produced by Russell T. Davies by reading the end credits of the shows. 8. Terry Nation’s bad service at a local restaurant led to him penning a vitriolic tale about Stavros and where he could stick some oversized salt shakers. The BBC’s legal department stepped in, effected a few changes, and the Doctor’s most famous foes were born. 9. K-2 had an incurable fear of beards and had to be put to sleep. 10. A very disturbing storyline was canned when Sylvester McCoy refused to appear in anything so dark. The story was later expanded and spun off into a show in its own right: Byker Grove. 11. I had four “Enemies of Doctor Who” jigsaws when I was young. The Sontarans (pictured above) plus Giant Robots, Zygons, and one other enemy...
Jill Trent: Science, Sleuthing, Sex, And Violence
Jill Trent – accompanied by her best friend Daisy Smythe – was a comic book heroine from the 1940s, appearing in issues of Fighting Yank and Wonder Comics. We should, of course, welcome anything that pushes forward female equality or superiority during that period, as well as the promotion of science. And yet… Here we see Jill and Daisy using top quality sleuthing skills to detect some criminals in front of them, then utilising science in the form of kinetic energy delivered via fists and feet. Two different types of science on display here: the science of ballistics and the science of slapping dogs. Dogslappingology was discredited in the 1960s as it was found to have no more than a placebo effect in quelling vicious canines. The Jill Trent storylines featured her inventions heavily; x-ray glasses, gas detectors, and the precursor to the laser were all covered. In this particular strip we see one of the more unusual gadgets she came up with: a camera that fires boxes of tools at people. I’ve lost track of the number of times a toolbox-firing adapter would have come in useful on my Canon 5D Mark II but while modern scientists spend any amount of time trying to recreate the creations of Star Trek, Jill Trent’s mind is left untapped. The science of ballistics once again. We can only assume that prior to a later case Daisy and Jill looked over what went right and what went wrong in order to learn from it and decided that some target shooting practice wouldn’t go amiss, since their bullets apparently did. Violence sells comics (both when represented in pictorial form and when used by threatening comic store owners against nerds). Do you know what else sells comic strips? Sex. You’re shocked, aren’t you? Still, it’s true, and the writers and artists of the Jill Trent strips couldn’t leave Jill alone doing manly things such as science and shooting and punching the living shit out of villains without an occasional damsel-in-distress moment, especially if it featured a little bondage action and giant erections (metal ones; not the ones you’re thinking of, pervert). Still, worse than resorting to stereotypes of the sexes is probably the science itself. In case you’re wondering about the above strip let me clear things up: poison rays aren’t a thing, ultraviolet poisons aren’t a thing, and combatting ultraviolet using infrared isn’t a thing either. Unlike the Jill Trent authors I used real science to prove this, publishing my results for peer-review earlier this year. I’m currently awaiting trial on eight counts of killing professional scientist and amateur sleuth women and may...
Rabbit Suit
"Why are you wearing a rabbit suit?" "Why are you wearing a little human suit?" "After what you call centuries of experimentation it has been determined that this form best fits our purpose of pre-invasion intelligence gathering on 'M' class – that's M for Meat, by the way, and nothing to do with your entertaining distraction media called Star Trek – worlds. Close proximity to a large cross section of the dominant species is necessary to take imprints of the thought processes that pulse through the brain analogue in use and thus present the most efficacious strategy for enslavement and consumption. You may rest assured, planetary representative in a rabbit suit, that when the end comes it will be swift and relatively painless thanks to the work of operatives such as myself currently deep undercover across the surface of this oblate spheroid. We're also in cats." "I think I'm going to give you this lolly from my basket and back away slowly from you and your… mum?" "Type 19 Model 3 Protector Unit. Heat ray, shielded against EMPs, and waterproofed to ten atmospheres." "Here you go then little chap." Google+: View post on...
Without Incident
The little fish clung to the underside of the jetsam, shivering with fear. After everything that had happened this somehow seemed the most scary moment of all. It was nearly silent; only the occasional bubble and splash on the surface punctuated the oppressive terror. There was nothing around. Which direction should he go? Would he ever see anyone again? Some shadow shifted in the distance. The fish held his breath. A trick of the fading light? No. The shadow became a shape and headed directly at him. Friend, or foe? Or… could it be? It was! “Dad! You came for me!” “Pierre! It is you! I knew it! Pierre, I’d swim every ocean for you. I’d go to war for you. I’d enter a squid’s suicide volcano for you. I’m just happy you’re safe.” “I was so scared, dad. But I met some new friends who helped me and then I got lost and, and, and I just knew you’d never give up.” “And I never will, believe that. Even when the shark gang had me encircled and even when the Eleanor the clumsy, giant squid inadvertently took me to the edge of her suicide volcano I knew I’d find a way out and find my way to you.” “I love you so much dad!” “And I love you too, little Pierre!” “I’m quite fond of the pair of you!” “Who’s that dad!?” “This is Petunia and she’ll be your new mum.” “This couldn’t have worked out any better dad. And look! A sparkle in the sky above! Even the oversea is happy! Everything’s just perfect!” * * * Olivia flexed her tentacles, squeezed them together, and soared upwards. “Whee!” screamed her babies as one even as they clung ever tighter to their mum’s arms. Olivia slowed and came to a halt, floating and bobbing gently with the warm current that came out of the west at this time of the year. She grinned and turned smoothly making sure that they were all alone in the deep, vibrant blue of the twilight-lit ocean. “Okay, now you,” said the octopus looking at the tentacles she had stretched out in front of her. On them, wrapped around tightly, were Leo, Lisa, Jenny, and Jack. “Let’s show your father how well you can swim when he gets back from the office.” Nobody moved. “You go first,” said Lisa nervously, looking towards her twin Leo. “No way,” said her brother, and he twisted his arms into a knot around his mother’s. “Jenny? Jack?” asked Olivia, amused. Darting eyes and nervous shakes of the heads were the only answer. They were the youngest two...
Recent From Retro
-
The Women Of Kilobaud Computing Sep 26, 2016 -
-
-
-
-
Recent From Entertainment
-
Dance Music Triple Nov 19, 2016 -
-
-
-
-
Recent Comments