Viral Bible
Shamelessly inspired by this tweet Inspiring the internet generation to pick up the Bible using a few tips and tricks from the headline writers of viral media websites. This Deity Started With Nothing. What He Achieved In Six Days Will Amaze You! This Bush Catches Fire And Starts Talking And I Still Can’t Believe What It Says! These People Started Counting Israelites. OMG… So Many Israelites! Where These People Set Out From Will Make You Laugh So Much! I Was Shocked That This Army Murdered Men, Women, Children, And Animals. But Then I Saw God Said It Was Okay. LOL! This Old Man Receives Some Bad News. What Happens Next Will Truly Shock You! This King’s Love For Virgins Will End Up Saving His Life! Wow! This Man Replies To His Friend. What He Says Will Bore The Living Shit Out Of You! I Learnt That If You Disobey God He’ll Put You In A Fish. And Now I’ll Never Forget It. This Man’s Wife Is Having Someone Else’s Baby But He’s Sticking By Her. What An Idiot! This Lamb Can Do Some Amazing Things Without Opposable Thumbs....
Alien Erotica
Via The Toast and the mind of Mallory Ortberg is a fantastically funny piece of Erotica Written By An Alien Pretending Not To Be Horrified By The Human Body, featuring instantly recognisable yet unarguably disgusting acts of sexual intercourse such as: They licked one another as if they were food, but they were not food. And: Some sort of gel...
Photography By Cari Ann Wayman
One of the people I follow on Flickr and whom I often end up favouriting nearly everything she posts is Cari Ann Wayman. Cari hails from northern Illinois and has a penchant for taking pictures of herself in abandoned buildings. As luck would have it I like abandoned building photography and Cari’s pictures are great examples. The mix of decayed surroundings with Cari herself produces some fantastic, contrasting compositions. One of the most impressive aspects of the photos is the great light she seems to get too; not something I would have imagined a typical abandoned building would have. A selection of Cari Ann’s photos. In addition to her Flickr page Cari’s photography can be found on her website and her Facebook...
Portsmouth Street Games
Last weekend saw Portsmouth Street Games make an appearance in Guildhall Square. For two days we were treated to free runners, roller derby girls, cyclists, live music, and lots of street art from local and national artists. The weather was good, there were plenty of stalls selling arts, crafts, and refreshments, and I think it’s fair to say that fun was had by all who attended. I’ve uploaded the photos I took of the day to my Flickr stream and you can view the full set of images in an album here: Portsmouth Street Games 2014. Here’s a selection of photos to whet your appetite or, alternatively, save you the bother of checking that album out. The “games” element of the weekend featured cyclists, skateboarders, scooters, roller derby, exercising, dancing, and free-running. There were also activities for kids in the way of amusement rides and the chance to do some supervised street art of their own. An area was set aside for a DJ to play music and there was even some live entertainment from local rapper Blessed. For me the biggest draw of the weekend was the street art, co-organised by local legend My Dog Sighs and featuring pieces created over the two days by street artists local and national. A New York subway train was the largest bit of canvas and drew some attention from British Transport Police on the Saturday morning who raised concerns that its presence was irresponsible and could lead to people deciding to spray paint on some of the local rolling stock. What a sad bunch of people they...
How Portsmouth Might Have Been
Via http://www.lukestubbs.com/index.php/78-blog/83-portsmouth-s-1970s-roads-plan comes this short article showing off the road plans for Portsmouth in the 1970s discovered while searching for references to famous Pompey landmark, the Johnson & Johnson Roundabout (not a roundabout; no Johnson & Johnson building; but those of us of a certain age know where it is). For me, at least, it’s quite weird to see what might have been, especially the route the Eastern Road would have taken all the way into the city centre. The northern part of the Eastern Road was to be upgraded to full dual carriageway with flyovers. The southern part was to follow a completely different line that would have linked up with Winston Churchill Avenue. Departing from the old road just south of Portsmouth College, it would have hugged the coast, crossing open space that is now the University’s Langstone campus before turning in and following a line along the old canal just off Locksway Road. […] The road would then have continued broadly along the line of Goldsmith Avenue. It is because of the safeguarding of this route that some of the industrial units around Fratton station remain to this day. Clicking the image below will load a very high resolution image of the plan (over 7MB in size; you have been warned) or you can head along to Luke’s site via the link above to see a few close crops of areas of interest as well as some write-ups of the seventies’ proposed road plans for...
All Ears
“I’m all ears,” I said as I lowered myself onto the tree stump opposite the doctor. The doctor fished one hand into a worn-looking pocket in his coat and pulled out a short wooden pipe. Over the next couple of minutes he also retrieved tobacco and a lighter and proceeded to do all the right things with those three objects. He made a couple of sucking sounds and exhaled a small cloud. “Well,” the doctor said, after quite a long wait. “Well, you’re not all ears,” he continued. “There’s a mouth there.” He pointed at me with the mouthpiece of the pipe, a far better use for the item than using it to smoke in my opinion, though I kept the thought to myself. “Yes,” I answered with a sigh. “This right here is a mouth. Technically, I’m not all ears but for all intents and purposes I am.” “Hmmm.” We sat in silence for as long it takes a doctor to inhale and exhale from a pipe three more times. “How did you know who I was and where I was?” he asked. I shrugged my ear-covered shoulders. “I’m not sure what you’re asking there.” “You don’t have any eyes,” the doctor continued. “I’m over 90% ears,” I replied. “Despite not having any eyes my hearing prowess enables me to build up an in-depth view of the world that’s probably better than every other person on the planet.” “A bit like that superhero in that bloody awful movie?” “Daredevil? Yes, I suppose so. I suppose you could say I’m just like Daredevil if Daredevil was a walking bush of ears. Do you think there’s much call for a comic book adaptation of a mostly-ear bit of shrubbery? Is that the sort of superhero kids will want to be?” The doctor looked uncomfortably at his pipe. “I’m sorry for snapping,” I said. “I’m just after some help. I’m tired of being this way. Can you help?” The doctor took another deep puff. “My doctorate is honorary,” he said, punctuating the sentence with a smoke ring and barely-concealed look of joy at the O-shaped cloud. “And it’s in philosophy.” “Damn.” “Hmmm.” I slumped, defeated. “Have you thought about taking up pipe-smoking?” “No hands,” I said. “I’m all ears.” “Hmmm.” The doctor tried his best to ignore me, tried his best to concentrate on smoking, and I sat in silence for a few moments more. After what seemed a satisfactory amount of time to convey my disappointment and send waves of what I hoped was guilt over the man in some petty way of spreading misery I lifted myself off the...
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