January Links
Here’s a collection of links to articles or videos or whatever the hell else that I’ve liked elsewhere on the web this month, some of which I’ve shared on other social networks and some of which I’ve not. I know January’s not over yet but busy, busy, busy… you know how it is. Unless you’re not busy and never have been. I don’t really care if you know how it is or don’t. London in 1973 and 1974. Beautiful. If you love grey. The television cameras really shouldn’t make a difference is a well-written article in my local newspaper that talks about the fuss that emerged over my MP, Penny Mordaunt, appearing on a TV programme to raise money for a local amenity. She didn’t do so well in the programme itself but that wasn’t the point. One of the good things to come out of the whole fuss was seeing just how nasty and spiteful some people – mostly Labour supporters, you won’t be surprised to hear – can be. It’s always nice to know that the world is full of bitter scum. A link to an article on this site now – Watching North Korean Television – which got linked to from a Polish website, http://www.wykop.pl/. And that sent a lot of traffic here. The Which Star Wars Character Are You? quiz proved popular with friends on Facebook. I was a stormtrooper, in case you wanted to know. A memory of this video mix popped into my head while driving home one day this month. I don’t know why. That hardly seems important because it’s still as good now as it ever was. What a lovely dress! Now, if only I knew someone with gigantism of the head on whom it would look as nice. In a scene reminiscent of something from Father Ted but not nearly as funny a group of medieval-minded Christian morons in Northern Ireland got a play cancelled without seeing it because there was a chance it might make fun of the bible. Down with this sort of thing! Careful now! National Geographic shared a list of the 8 scarients viewing platforms in the world, one of which – the Aurland Lookout – I walked on last year. It wasn’t scary. But then I am rugged and manly. A new release of an NFL-themed bad lip reading will ease the pain of the Patriots getting knocked out in the AFC championship game. A new supernova! Is pseudoarchaeology racist? Could also have been titled Is Erich von Däniken an Arse? The answer would have been the same in each instance. Spaceship Generator. I just...
Vintage Technology
A small selection of vintage pieces of technology, some of which were precursors to more modern technological marvels and others of which were unique in the history of invention. Nordmende NASEX-1 Manufactured in Germany in 1970, the NASEX-1 was the only attempt by Nordmende to enter what many European companies were hoping would be dubbed “The Smelly Seventies” (although, thanks to their various native languages this term only worked alliteratively in the United Kingdom and no companies there wanted to take part); technology that excited the nasal senses was anticipated to be the next big thing. The NASEX-1 worked with special cassette cartridges to produce pleasing smells in a manner “composed” by scent artists. Unlike modern plug-ins that simply use perfumes, the cassettes for the Nordmende device contained electronic instructions for the machine so that it could manufacture the chemical smells internally. A combination of requiring eight 1.5V batteries, five key chemical capsules in the device, and cassettes to generate the odours made the NASEX-1 very expensive and it never achieved enough sales to warrant its continued manufacture past 1971. The best-selling cassette for the Nordmende NASEX-1 was Mein Haus by Karlheinz Stockhausen, described as “a nasal exploration of my home in Kürten”. In it Karlheinz took the smeller through his garden, his kitchen, his library, and his sex dungeon in a series of distinct pieces. Toshari M3/A “Tricorder” It’s quite likely that you won’t have heard of the Tokyo-based Toshari company or its flagship 1981 invention, the M3/A, dubbed the “Tricorder” by those few people who used it, were Star Trek fans, and lived to tell the tale. The M3/A was a handheld device designed to be used by medical professionals in quickly diagnosing a wide range of illnesses and diseases. The device had a clamshell form factor with a lower section containing scanning parameter selection through a cursor input system and an upper section containing a monochrome display and the scanning equipment itself. Although the M3/A was only initially configured to identify two dozen common illnesses Toshari had designed the system to be upgradeable with swappable ROM chips in its base. That, however, was not the root cause of its swift demise in the marketplace. Because of a government-driven desire for technology of this type the normal testing processes were shortened somewhat, sadly with lethal consequences. The Toshari M3/A’s scanner used unshielded gamma rays to perform its numerous analyses and both users and patients alike soon succumbed to a number of side effects including, unfortunately, fatal Godzillaitis. It was only the M3/A’s superior abilities to detect that very same common Japanese illness that enabled the device to...
Street Photography By Tadashi Yamashita
Another post in my occasional series of photographers I’ve discovered on Google+, this time featuring Tokyo-based Tadashi Yamashita. There are quite a few Japanese street photographers on Google+ and there’s something about the style of street photography from Japan – and, particularly, that from the big cities such as Tokyo – that always appeals to me. And it’s not just the occasional Godzilla sighting or tentacle-related attack on schoolgirls that creeps into every series of photos (although that doesn’t hurt); rather, it’s the buzz of activity, the claustrophobia, the closeness of the shots, the prevalence of nighttime-shooting with its Blade Runner-feeling neon and rain… it’s all of that together and many more intangible things. In short: I really like Japanese street photography. So, here are some shots from one of its proponents who I happen to follow: Beautiful tones in this shot; the low contrast, subject matter, and presence of those lines make this look like Tadashi travelled back in time to the 1950s to snap the photo. And there’s every chance he did. Tokyo is still a hub of amazing, emerging technologies. You can’t engage in street photography for long in Tokyo without taking a picture of the metro system. It’s actually a law – and one of the more sensible ones in case you’re wondering – and it’s nice to see that Tadashi is no lawbreaker. Photographer in front of her, photographer behind her, and she picked this day of all days to dress up in her wampa outfit. No wonder she’s sporting an icy stare. Icy! It’s a pun! One of the great services to mankind that a street photographer can do – and there aren’t many, admittedly – is capture those aspects of society that we aren’t always comfortable being reminded of. Here, Tadashi has convinced a nose-bunger to pose for a portrait. Nose-bunging is one of those taboo activities in the far east of Asia, rarely discussed, hardly ever documented. Great, poignant shot. Street art isn’t very popular in Tokyo as most Japanese art needs to be pixellated but occasionally something different appears and the street photographer is usually on hand to illuminate it. In this case: are we our possessions or are our possessions us? And if we are our possessions and our possessions are mostly cardboard boxes will we get soggy when it rains? Thought-provoking. A not-overly-concerned citizen looks up as Mothra once again fills the sky. There’s a belief that everything is smaller and better in Japan – think of Japan as the anti-Texas if you will – and while this isn’t strictly true it does hold out for their superheroes....
Surviving Drone Attacks
With the vast amount of drones in the sky spying on us all and executing people without trial there’s never been a better time to embrace our mole man heritage and return to the subterranean caverns from whence we came. Unfortunately, however, the behemoth that is Amazon hasn’t recently invested in a robotic tunnelling delivery system so there’s every chance they’ll wield their mighty power to prevent all this from happening which means that the future is a drone-filled one, like it or not. How will we cope? Well, one particular site has compiled a helpful guide to surviving drones: http://dronesurvivalguide.org/ As you can see, the site contains a handy chart you can download and print showing some of the most popular types of drones in the skies over a swarthy-looking individual near you right now. Or over you, if you’re a bit swarthy-looking. Or if you once talked to someone a bit swarthy-looking. Did you know there were so many different types of drones? I didn’t. I also didn’t know that India’s Rustom I drone… … was clearly designed by a fan of Klingon Battle Cruisers. If India arm their drones and kill you then at least you can enter Sto’Vo’Kor safe in the knowledge that it was a good day to die. So, just what advice can be given to someone looking to survive a drone attack? Hire body doubles as decoys and to give youngsters a rewarding – if short – job in these troubling economic times Surround yourself with anti-drone drones to frighten off the drones Fool thermal imaging cameras on drones by setting light to everything near you with a flame thrower whenever you take a walk Surround yourself with anti-anti-drone drones to protect you from the anti-drone drones that defect Remain in your Fortress of Protection at all times Run really fast everywhere, changing direction a lot, trying not to look suspicious Dress like a drone so that the anti-anti-drone drones that rise up against humanity will think you’re one of them Don’t accept a wedding invitation in Asia or the Middle...
Watching North Korean Television
I don’t speak North Korean but luckily for me it’s not difficult to tell what’s going on when it comes to North Korean television programming as I’ve discovered this morning. If you’re interested in watching live North Korean TV – and why wouldn’t you be? – then the link I was using (and you’ll need a media player to view it) is this one: mms://112.170.78.145/chosun. So, what television programme from the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea was I watching? It was – I think – the Kim Jong-un Happy Execution Hour Mandatory Funtime Show! This show is the highest rated show on North Korean television along with every other show on North Korean television. Presided over by a robot of the Korean leader, each week an enemy of the people takes part in a series of challenges to determine just how it is they’re to be eradicated from existence. It’s a bit like The Running Man but without the figure hugging outfits. And you thought North Korea was a country with no taste. Shame on you! This programme’s executionee-to-be was an elderly general, one of Kim Jong-un’s favourite choices to die and – by law – one of every North Korean citizen’s favourite choices to die too. The general looked more or less amused by the whole spectacle as the host of the programme (on the right) explained the many ways of death that could be enacted upon him. To the left one of the executioners – I’m going to call her Lady Tar Death for reasons that will become clearer later – ensured that the general didn’t make a break for it. Of course, they never make a break for it but it’s important that North Korean viewers don’t entertain the possibility in their heads either (under penalty of execution) so the presence of a formidable killer is important. And there’s the sex appeal angle too. Being appealed by sex also carries a penalty of execution. The execution building was very impressive. A series of steps – being pushed down them until both hips shatter is one of the possibilities for geriatric enemies – led up to the North Korean leader robot. The Kimbot was flanked either side by what looked like balconies to my western eyes but which turned out to be presses able to rise and fall on the columns crushing flesh and bones beneath their weight. Inventive! The wall of the Kimbot’s alcove featured a film on loop of last week’s execution where a distant cousin of Kim Jong-un had been strapped to fireworks and fired into the sky over the Taedong River. At this...
An Absence Of Polaroids
I am a fan of photography and I am a fan of retro or vintage things so it should come as no surprise to learn that I am a fan of vintage photography, and I’m not alone. Of the many other people out there with websites that cater for old photography one of my favourites is An Absence which simply posts old Polaroid (and non-Polaroid) photos. There’s something so warming looking at these instants of the recent past captured in colour-faded glory. The only thing missing from the pictures is an explanation of what’s happening. Of course, you can usually work it...
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